I am trying to decide what kind of a sponsor I want to have. There are a few people who I am considering, and I'm not sure which person is right for me. I don't know if it would be better to pick someone who is a lot like me or if I should pick someone really different because she'll help me see things in a different way.I'm interested in the sponsorship process, though, and I think that it might do me some good. I liked being able to talk to my mother when I was getting divorced from my first marriage, and I think the idea of having a more experienced, wiser mentor who has been through some of the things that I'm going through could be really helpful.
A few of the people who I'd most like to have as a sponsor aren't on the list as options. I wonder why?
I don't really understand how the process works. I wish I didn't have to ask someone. I wish it were a bit more formal.
I need a nap. It's been a long, long week.
He's going to go stay with his mother. He's taking the new dog and leaving me our puppy. I'm excited to have an evening alone. I kind of wish he'd taken both dogs, though, because I'd like to have a real evening to myself.
I never used to crave this space the way I do now. I don't think I would have, either. I love the idea of him being gone, of having the bed to myself, of being able to do whatever I want.
I can't wait for the weekend. This week is boring and tiresome and insufferable. I can't believe it's only 3:30. I was thinking of staying at work until 6:30 so that I could go straight to my meeting, but I don't know if I'm going to make it. Maybe I should go home and take a nap...or maybe I should just tough it out and stay, make some money, go to my meeting, go home, bathe luxuriously, and go to bed.
Ahhhh...that sounds so nice. And it would be nice to get a big paycheck. Maybe I can stand to stay. I could go buy some coffee...that might do the trick...
2 comments:
I found your blog through your post on Kel's site. I know exactly what you mean about having delicious private time for yourself. I always feel as though 40 lbs. has been lifted from my shoulders when my abusive husband is out of the house for a whole night. Knowing that I don't have to sleep next to him is a major thrill. I imagine a future night, sleeping alone in my own bed, feeling free from the angry beast. That visualization gives me the strength to go through my divorce proceedings.
I fired my first sponsor. The second person I asked said no. The third time was the charm. After the first two people it was really hard to ask the the third one, but I went through with it. I am so glad I did.
I'm just starting step four, the moral inventory. My sponsor and I had a long talk about it Friday night. She helped so much. I was so nervous about dredging up all of those memories, positive and negative, but I think I am ready now.
Get a sponsor!
Enjoy your evening.
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