Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Not Dead Yet.

I think it's getting close to past the time for Mexican Heroin Dealers to be making house calls.

His gun is a fucking bb gun. I don't know what kind of addict dramatic bullshit that was last night, waving it in the air like he was R. Kelly, (That's right EJ, I stole your phrase. Whachoo gonna do about it?) but I came home insisting that we sell the fucking thing or that he give it to the dealer or I'd make him leave blah blah blah, and he showed me that it's a very impressive-looking bb gun.

So that's one thing not to be scared about.

He'd fixed a bath for me when I got home. I like baths. We talked a lot, and I told him what I need. Here's the list:

  • No guns.
  • No threats of criminal activity.
  • No strange mofos up in my house.
  • No drugs.
  • For him to go to meetings.
He has agreed to my list of demands. Possibly, he has agreed to my list of demands to make me shut up. He's pacing the floor, freaking out about how he's going to get money. I've been making coasters.

He appeared to hear me, though, in the way that he didn't for a long time. He didn't like it when I told him the stuff about how this addict dramatic stuff is getting in the way of my living, down to the level of my thoughts...the language that is invading my thoughts. Sometimes, all I want is to feel like I've been heard.

5 comments:

Recovering Wino said...

Oh, hang in there. I wish I could just come and kick some sense into that husband of yours:)

longvowels said...

Maybe you need too sing that Jill Scott song for him, cause getting in the the way with how you're living.
I'll remix it for you.

The Discovering Alcoholic said...

When the guns and the dealers show up at the door, it's time to bail. Nothing, absolutely nothing good will come from this.

I hope you will consider sending him far away. It's one ting to put up with the pain and stress in the hopes that he will recover, but you have to draw the line at your own safety.

sKILLz said...

Hey "mofos" is my thang! :P

I hope he wasnt just "yesing" you to death just to apease you. I dont think those are un-resonable demands if you want to call them that.
I mean if my wife (Gypsy she posted 2night on here under my name until she gets her own acount she was too tired to make one of her own at the time)
asked me for that I would comply because I dont want her hurt, I dont want her to think bad things are going to happen to me. I dont want her having to worry if I going to go to jail or not.
So again i dont think those are that bad of demands to ask of him and I really hope he at least fucking trys!

Tigermom said...

Hi TJW,

What is a grown up man doing with a BB gun?

And they are not benign. 30 years ago a neighbor of mine got shot in the face with a BB gun and lost an eye.