Thursday, December 18, 2008


I am fried. I'm not writing well. It's sucky.

I have a huge project that I'm trying to finish that was due on Monday, and it's been eating my brains. I have decided that today, I'm going to work on other projects and let the big, soul-sucking one lie for a bit. I hope this helps.

I'm not sleeping well. I'm not going to yoga. I'm not doing much besides sitting in front of my laptop in a questionable state of sanitation, writing.

One thing I have been doing in the midst of it all is keeping up my meditation practice, and it has served me well. Having a few minutes to be quiet and to notice my state has helped me to stay aware and to recognize that I'm doing a bad job at meeting my own most important needs. I have had a few experiences this week in meditation that have been powerful, and one last night has given me some insight into the way I'm working.

God gave me a gift with words, and I honor that gift when I use it well. It serves me; it is how I make my living. It is how I serve others. It is how I soothe myself when I'm struggling. However, when I exploit it like I'm doing right now, I don't honor that gift. I've got to learn to slow down and take my time to avoid exploiting this skill. I need to nurture it so that I can use it to nurture me.